If you pick up a fare who asks to be dropped of at the local Irish pub, at least your LTI taxi is British. But for many people they drive their German/Spanish/French cars and enjoy an Irish pub where they will drink a Belgian beer or Australian wine, then travelling home, grab an Indian curry, a Chinese takeaway or a Turkish kebab on, then sit on Swedish furniture and watch an American show on a Japanese TV.

But what is the most “British” thing of all?  Suspicion of all things foreign!

Only in Britain can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

Only in Britain do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front

Only in Britain do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries and a DIET cola

Only in Britain do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counters

Only in Britain do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the drive and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage

Only in Britain do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won’t miss a call from someone we didn’t want to talk to in the first place

Only in Britain are there disabled parking places in front of a skating rink

Every year Brits die doing some unusual things – 3 Brits die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue! 142 Brits were injured in 1999 by not removing all pins from new shirts. 58 Brits are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of screwdrivers. 31 Brits have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the fairy lights were plugged in. 19 Brits have died in the last 3 years believing that Christmas decorations were chocolate. British Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after Xmas cracker-pulling accidents. 18 Brits had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit cigarette in their mouth. A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last two years after trying to open bottles of beer with their teeth. 5 Brits were injured last year in accidents involving out-of-control Scalextric cars.

And finally…in 2000 eight Brits were admitted to hospital with fractured skulls incurred whilst throwing up into the toilet.

Makes you proud to be British.